The men called “womanizers” know who we are. When we shake, they smile and stretch their eyes. We are butt. We eat flesh; therefore, we are mostly fleshy. Don’t you know that we are butt?

Ask any buttologist. A buttologist is a man who knows more about the importance and uses of butt. He has spent much of his adult life studying and relishing and cataloguing the sweetness, friskiness, powerfulness, rockability, shakability, bouncibility, jerkability and freakability of butt.

When we rock, womanizers squeeze their legs together. Don’t you know that we are the ones called butt? We are on earth to make men go crazy. But wait-o, don’t you know that we can send men crazy. Haven’t you observed how they behave when they see us, when we shake ourselves in front of them, and when we rock wor-loh-wor-loh in front of them? We are butt.

Did we say that we eat flesh like kanyan, making us mostly fleshy? Yes, but that does not mean that all of us are always fleshy. There is flat butt. There is dry butt. There is small butt. There is also big butt, commonly called bubble butt. There is funny-looking butt. There is round butt. There is heavy-duty butt. There is sizable butt. There is fleshy butt, but there is also bone butt.

Have we already mentioned that there is juma-juma or dukulu-dukulu butt? There is frisky butt, which enjoys shaking for no reason. No, for a reason – to send men crazy. We have told you about the wor-loh-wor-loh butt, which can rock like water in a huge balloon. Hmm, we are butt.

Have you heard about split butt, which can cause confusion between us butt and the thigh? But don’t forget that there is also the one called heleva butt, which sometimes looks like a small hill somewhere.

The graphic designer with the New Dawn newspaper saw the picture of a heleva butt on the Internet and yelled, “Ah! Yor looka butt eh.” He couldn’t believe what his eyes had seen, but it was heleva butt in action. You able heleva butt?

There is also the portable butt, which you imagine carrying without any headache. There is also the cool butt, which just looks pleasant to the eyes. There is also hanging butt, which you think would drop anytime soon. Have you heard about sharp butt, which looks as if it wanted to end like the bottom of a pepper mortar?

Don’t forget, though, that there is soft butt and hard butt, just as there is smooth butt and rough butt. Remember, also, that there is craw-craw butt. Da na fi-yah comin’ from our mou’h.

What you have to remember is that we are butt. We are the butt of Femaletobutt in the country called Buttoland. We send me crazy. You like it, jacko; you na like it, Jack-o’-Lantern.

Seriously, my people, aren’t these points to ponder?

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